Kim, Jusung / Page 109 Ch4 Pt 5 A-3 / 2017 Summer Session Prose & Paragraphs

Ch4 Pt 5 A-3: How can we solve the conflict of working mothers? In other words, what should society do to help women balance work and family if they must or want to work?

Yield Some, Earn Some

             Gender equality has been an issue for decades and it still is one. We are still stuck in the frame that men usually work and women usually stay at home. The question itself is made under the premise of a men working and women staying at home. Therefore, I deny the question and will take it as "How can society help people balance work and family if they must or want to work?" The reality is that women are suffering more than men because of the conflict between work and family. How can we solve this problem? I suggest the society to enhance sex equality in family and develop substantive ways to deal with problems like kids alone and women's interrupted career.

             I searched for the origin of sexism to find out how it started in the history. According to The Brief History of The World, a lecture by Peter N. Stearns, sexism started with the agricultural and sedentary society where physical ability is important. The idea of one sex (mostly women) being inferior to the other have been widely accepted since then. But now, things have changed and the society demands for intellectual works as well as physical labors, which women can do just as good as men. So, there should be no stereotype of women taking care of the family alone. Even though, it seems that the ideal of sex equality is not materialized entirely nowadays so we will have to deal with it.

             One parent working and the other staying at home is the ideal situation for the family, especially for children. However, problems occur when both parents want to or have to work. My parents worked together so my grandmother had to take care of me when I was young. I remember my parents coming home late at 10pm, myself spending the day with grandmother. However, what If my grandmother was not there? I would have been alone for most of the time. It will cause not only psychological problems, but also health and educational problems. That is the reason why some people choose to give up on their job. My mother, for instance, had to resign her job as a director of kindergarten when grandmother passed away to take care of me. Now my sister and myself became independent and she is free to work. However, my mother cannot go back to work because the gap years were too long; a career interruption has occurred. This is not only my mother's story but probably also a lot of mothers' choices.

In my experience, house chore was not an easy thing. I live with my sister in Seoul, parting house chores equally to each of us. But recently, a crisis came to me. My sister had to get an operation and I had to take care of her. The parted house chores were now entirely up to me. I found that a simple dine is a very complex, tiresome, and time-consuming work when it is done alone. It took three hours for me to cook, eat, do the dishes and clean up the kitchen. I only do it once a day because breakfast and lunch are relatively simple, but dinner is always the pain. Now I nearly understand my mother who cooks more than twice a day, and how the house chores are difficult. Therefore, house works and children are the main problems at home.

What can society do to solve these problems? First, the society should make an atmosphere enhancing men's participation in house chores and children nurturing. As mentioned above, managing house works was easy when it was done with my sister so, if done together, women will have less burden on them. Second, expanding day care facilities will help couples who necessarily earn a livelihood together to take care of the children for them. Third, developing a program for people whose career was interrupted while they take care of the family will lessen troubles in choosing whether to stop working or not for childbirth or nurturing.

To sum up, there are many problems in couples that work together, and it is often women that suffers. Gap of a person who works at home brings a lot of problems in maintaining house works and raising children. If one parent cannot work for the family, other options should be devised. Parting house and educational duties among parents is one option, and it should be pushed by the society as whole. Also, increase of day care facility and career-development program will help overcoming the problems. There are a lot of problems but, if we take a step ahead and try to take the burden of our precious person or partner, we will yield some, and earn some.