Cause and effect.
I have always thought that there are two ways to develop romantic relationships to the next stage: couples either terminate them or marry. In case of marriage, a lot of people tend to make a lot of mistakes, misunderstand each other and certain behaviors can lead to the divorce.
I think one of the common reasons of divorces is criticism. Men and women often forget that they are from different "worlds": they think and act differently. After period of strong affection couples tend to calm down and start seeing their spouses in new, usually, unpleasant way. Things that used to amuse now irritate. Small habits become annoying after marriage and people start arguing with each other. They forgot that they have felt for this person and now they just want to criticize and prove their own point of view. What happens when we criticize? It is not just a remark of somebody's misdeed; destructive criticism shows that this person views himself as a better, or more capable than his partner. He/she exercises his/her authority over the partner by criticizing. Of course, normally other person can't put up with it for a long time and just…leaves.
Other reasons are "stone-walling" and defensiveness. Rather than trying to talk about the problems, partners try to avoid discussing it blame each other for what happened. The consequences of such behaviors accumulate with time and one day lead to "explosion". So, that's why it is very important to communicate and tell your spouse about things that bother you in his/her actions or others.
Another cause is passiveness. Partners know that they have troubles in their communication but still just avoid it or immediately start considering divorce as "panacea" for all problems. Marriage just like love requires constant contribution, respect and hard work. If people don't make enough efforts they don't receive any positive results and end up being divorced.
Loved your writing. I agree that stone-walling and passiveness is often a grave factor that makes relationships go bad. I also think that it takes much care and effort to make relationships work. I see that you've used the cause and effect and liked it cause it showed what you think more concisely and logically.
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